Sued
by Tsuki Takabayashi
Summary: Crackfic! Kagome should have known better when her American "Cousin" had come to visit her. It was rather odd that she'd never heard of the woman till now.
1. Screaming in a crowd

Kagome stared at her mother in disbelief. "From America mom?"

Her mother seemed to be pleased with this bit of information and nodded, "Her name is Serah."

Kagome blinked a couple of times before turning her back on her mother, what would be the odds that she had an **AMERICAN** cousin. Honestly, if she was _**so **_much of a "cousin", then where had she been the past, what, 13 years of her life? Father hadn't even remotely mentioned having a sibling or having a cousin at all before his death. 'Or it could be Naraku in the future trying to destroy me here.' she snorted to herself.

Within several seconds a couple of emotions passed on the young woman's face, then a frown settled on her lips, "Mother," she called back looking to see that the woman had spare bed sheets and coverings in her hands, "how old is she again?"

Ms. Higurashi thought for a moment, "I believe that she's eighteen just like you." her mother answered and Kagome found herself more than annoyed.

She wondered if this American cousin had "Yellow Fever" as they would call it. It would suck entirely if she did. Shrugging her shoulders, Kagome cast the thoughts of entertaining a squealing moron from her head. It wasn't as if _**she **_had to deal with the girl.

Why you ask?

Because, she would be on the other side of the well battling for her life to fight Naraku and his evil pets. That's why.

Kagome found herself feeling sorry for her mother as she packed her things, but then again, she wasn't immune to the annoying thought of having to deal with someone who she probably wasn't even _**related**_ to.

"Bye mom!" she called out as she found herself running into a soft body of a female a little taller than herself. Backing up, Kagome narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

Kagome's right eye twitched, "Who are you?"

Before the woman could even speak, Kagome noted that she instantly _**hated**_ the girl. Strangely enough, the girl was unnaturally beautiful with blonde hair that happened to be streaked with a fiery red that reached to the back of her knees. The girl was very 'gifted' with the anatomy of a goddess, or something like that. Her hips were wide and seductive and her bust very generous yet through the highly stylish yet _modest_ clothing she wore, you can _**still**_ see them as if she were bare to the world. Long legs that seemed endless? _Check._ Kissable pink petal soft lips stretched into an inviting smile?_ Check._

Yep, Kagome decided with a nod, she hated her.

"Serah!" Souta brushed past her to embrace the girl, who he'd never seen before.

Kagome's eye twitched again as the girl hugged her little brother. Yep, this day was going to the craps, and she knew it.

"You must be cousin Kagome." Serah said in a sickly sweet and kind voice.

Kagome heaved a little in her mouth, but kept her tone civil, "Serah I presume?"

Sesshoumaru would be so proud of her. She had finally mastered the art of keeping her "mouth" shut!

The girl nodded, "It's so nice to meet you." she said with a grin.

….

Tch. Yeah.

"MOM!" Kagome turned on her heels and stalked back into the house to locate her mother, only to find her in the living room with her father in law. Kagome frowned, where the hell did he come from? "Serah's here." she grunted, tossing a thumb back at the girl who had followed her in. Souta was asking her questions in rapid speed almost never pausing for breath. The girl,**_ Serah_**, Kagome reminded herself answered all the questions with no amount of irritation.

"Serah! It's so nice to finally meet you!" Ms. Higurashi pulled the buxom blonde into her arms for a hug.

Kagome's right eye twitched again, as her mother seemed to ignore her to ask Serah about her trip her and the singing voice that she'd heard so much about.

Kagome wanted to die, singing voice?

Serah blushed "modestly" and began to sing some song that Kagome could have **_sworn_** she heard on the radio.

Another twitch to her right eye and Kagome watched in amusement as her family was wow'd by the idiot's talent. What's next? She had psychic abilities?

As if hearing that, Serah looked to Kagome with a glint behind her eyes, Kagome raised both her brows in challenge. What was this princess going to do that Kagome couldn't do ten times worse? 'You're on my turf now Blondie.'

Serah seemed distracted as Grandpa asked her about her getting accepted into that really expensive American college. "Oh yes and I've learned languages here and there and...

Kagome couldn't take it anymore.

'That's it I'm out of here.' she gripped the straps of her backpack over her shoulder and practically ran out of the house and jumped into the well with glee.

"See ya suckers!" she cackled.

A/N: Honesty, I have... what... three other stories that I'm supposed to be working on, but this came with a bloody vengeance. I really entertained the urge to just write the plot down and be done with it but noooooo! Muse had decided to back this one up. So what do you guys think?


	2. I wish horrible things on you

Kagome climbed out of the well with a grin. So she hadn't been exactly the nicest person, they would get over it. She whistled a happy little tune that she had stuck in her head as soon as she has arrived. Maybe she could stay here till the annoying woman left, her grin grew into an evil smirk. It seemed like a good plan. Not like "_Mommy's little overachiever_" could do this right?

What? Okay, so she knew that she was enjoying this a little too much, so sue her.

"Kagome!" Shippou launched himself into her arms and snuggled into the welcome embrace. The little russet haired kit blinked back up at her with half shed tears.

'Oh for the love of...'

"Get back here runt!" Inuyasha wearing a scowl marched up to them with an all too familiar intent to harm the little fox.

Kagome wanted to roll her eyes, but this was more preferable than the train wreck back at home. Hell, anything was better than that!

"Inuyasha, what have I told you about picking on Shippou?"

The male heard the tone in her voice and paused, "What got into your panties?" he said folding his arms.

"For your health, I don't want to talk about it okay?" she smiled with a little too much force.

"Keh." Inuyasha knew better than to question the girl who made ramen.

Shippou, seeing that he was no longer in the hot seat scampered off to do gods knew what to some poor unsuspecting villager, probably would rope poor Rin into it too.

Kagome smiled, "So has Sesshoumaru arrived back with any news on Naraku or the shards?"

"Yeah, and he won't tell us..." he trailed off and looked at her funny before sniffing her. Kagome stepped back and eyed the male and he followed stiffing her a little closer.

"Inuyasha what are you doing?"

Inuyasha hadn't the slightest clue as to what he was doing, all he knew was that this scent was irresistible, that must mean that whoever this scent belongs to must be his soul mate or whatever they called it these days. Kagome stepped back again and he followed.

"Why do you smell like that?"

Kagome knew what he smelled... or rather who.

"I fell into a box of glitter. I think I might be turning into something..." she paused and looked him in the eyes, "dangerous."

Inuyasha stared at her curiously and snorted, "Like what? A butterfly?"

"No, my scent, its supposed to lure you in like that," she responded insistently and he looked like he believed her too.

"Everything about me is supposed to be appealing to you." Kagome stifled a giggle behind her lip and Inuyasha happened to notice her mirth and glared at her.

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

Kagome broke out into laughter, leaving the brooding male where he stood.

"Hey wench get back.." he trailed off again, this time Kagome could feel why.

This wasn't funny anymore. She looked back to the well.

"Hello?"

She'd pissed someone off, she was sure of it.

"Inuyasha let's go." Kagome grabbed the male by the collar of his haori and pulled and growled when he didn't budge.

"I said let's go!" she snarled pulling him again and he still didn't budge.

How hard was it to ask for the fates to send some demon to fight them... and then she could lead the clueless "cousin" to the monster and let it eat her?

…

Or do some massive facial damage at least.

"Kagome is that you?" Serah's voice called out.

Kagome twitched and left Inuyasha to his devices, then grinned, she wondered how Kikyou would feel knowing that her male was sniffing around some other female.

It would be a shame to see the girl die by the hands of a vengeful Kikyou... NOT!

Then Sesshoumaru and Miroku had to appear, good gods. Really?

Sesshoumaru then narrowed his eyes upon the "innocent" female that was crawling from the well. He looked to Kagome with disgust, "Does that belong to you, Miko?"

Kagome sputtered, "Heck no!" and she flounced from the scene knowing what was going to happen next.

Kirara dashed past her and leaped into the arms of Serah who was "clueless." Sango who was following her companion, saw Serah and dropped to her knees, and stared on in astonishment. Kagome almost didn't want to ask.

"What's wrong Sango?"

"Kirara threw me off while I was riding her. Then she made a dash for the well... who is that?" She asked, not even noting that Miroku currently had Serah's hand in his proposing to her.

Kagome looked back at the scene and shrugged, "Some stranger that followed me." she responded and bent down to pick the woman up. "Get up. Kirara will come to her senses soon."

Then she heard a rather... odd sound escape Inuyasha's lips. Even Sesshoumaru took notice of it.

Kagome's eye twitched for the forth time that day and she registered an almost giddy laugh escaping the males lips.

Inuyasha ran to Serah and picked her up twirling her around, Kagome almost felt jealous of the woman, almost.

Wait... what?

"Serah!"

Kagome froze.

He _**KNEW**_ her?!

Oh this was rich.

"Serah d'you remember me?" he looked into Serah's emerald green eyes deeply as if willing her to remember him.

By some magical force of nature, she _did._ Would you look at that?

"I-Inuyasha? How do you know my cousin?"

"You mean to tell me that, that wench is hanyou too?"

_**Stop**_, **Pause** and _rewind_.

Say _what_?!

"I don't know... She doesn't even know that she's part demon either." Serah added looking at Kagome with wonder.

Everyone turned to look at Kagome and she froze with a slightly blank look on her face.

"UHM how about **NO**?! How can a Priestess, be a half demon at the same time?" she roared at the female who seemed to be offended by her tone.

"Kagome I don't know why you're being so mean to me..." she whimpered.

"Look, you're retarded OK? You don't belong here, and quite frankly, _I don't like you_." she hissed glaring at Serah through the slits in her eyes.

Kagome heard a dark chuckle and she barely registered it in favor of ripping into her "cousin". She wanted peace dang it!

"Maybe you're just threatened by my presence... I'm sure we'll get along soon." she said hopefully.

Kagome fought another involuntary movement of her face and added, "I don't plan on getting along with you... At all."

"Kagome that's not a nice thing to say to your cousin." Miroku pointed out. Sango added that she was a little "Too harsh" on the girl and asked how she would have felt if the shoe was on the other foot.

Kagome grew silent and left the chaos behind. Maybe Naraku could kill her instead?


	3. Things never go my way

Kagome sighed, Shippou and Rin were made to stay at the village with Kaede, due to Serah's worrying over their safety. There had been no fights which made the day boring, want to know why? All day demons had been running from them left and right, why you ask?

They were idiots that's why.

Kagome shot Serah a dark look and pictured herself plucking every single last strand of that "beautiful hair" from her skull... along with some of the leg hair from her legs... of course, everyone knew that Serah didn't **HAVE** leg hair. She probably pooped rainbow glitter too.

Everyone was so into her, about her celestial Inu demon heritage. Which made Serah transform into a pretty poodle like version of Sesshoumaru with gold in her fur.

Kagome almost got caught stealing Tessaiga from Inuyasha's grasp. If only dreams could come true, Kagome would have beheaded Serah where she stood.

Then they got to talking about Serah's ancestry. Turns out that she's the long lost daughter of the lord of the south. Conveniently, Sesshoumaru happened to be engaged to said daughter.

It was bad enough that Kagome had a crush on Sesshoumaru but he was the only person who

'Tough nuts sister, he's my normal sociopath! Mine I tell you!'

Kagome wanted to retch when the girl began to sing again, causing anyone in the vicinity to stop and stare at her. Come on!

Then turns out from some priests that they had passed, Serah was a reincarnated Midoriko.

Kagome snorted. What's next? Naraku proposing to her?

"Cousin Kagome, why are you so jealous of me?"

If it weren't for the fact that everyone was watching her, Kagome would have stabbed the girl in the neck with her toothbrush... Which wasn't a bad thought if you thought about it.

"I know you hate me but I'm going to have to ask you to stop with those violent thoughts towards me, I've done nothing wrong to you."

"Hey Serah?" Kagome smiled the best she could and was satisfied when the girl didn't look so defensive.

"Yes?"

"Drink bleach." Kagome suggested with a grin.

"Why would you say such an awful thing to me? All I want is for everyone to get along! Even I got Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha to get past their hatred. Why can't we do that too Kagome?"

Pretending that she had not heard it, she walked ahead of the group. 'Idiot.'

Inuyasha yelled at her to stop being so rude to her, and everyone else agreed.

Sango became the girl's new galpal overnight.

Kagome had known everyone in this group for three years and some days... where had the loyalty gone? She even _**fed**_ them using her money! This was bull crap. They could all die in a ray of sunshine for all she cared.

"Kagome, I'm going to be forced to kick you out of the group." Serah pouted her "demonic" aura flaring and her fangs peeking out of the side of her mouth "threateningly."

Kagome looked at her with a dry expression and pointedly ignored her again.

Kagome thought about it... It wasn't as if they couldn't fend for themselves in the wild. All Serah had to do was bat a sooty eyelash at Sesshoumaru and he would go kill something for her.

'He's my sociopath! Give him back! He can hate me all he wants!' she threw an inner tantrum. But then there was one guy that she could always count on. Kagome perked.

"See I don't have to explain myself to you. I really don't," Kagome smiled when they reached a fork in the road. "So bye!" she took the road that she knew they weren't going to travel, just because Serah **magically** knew where they were headed.

…

…

Right. The chances of her knowing where they were headed were the chances of Jakotsu being America's Next Top Model.

Kagome could bet her share of the jewel shards that the woman was a phoney.

So her current destination? Why to Kouga of course! By the time she reached the male, he and Ayame had welcomed her into the pack with no problem. Not that she'd expect there to be any.

"So where is that mutt and the rest of your pack?"

Honestly? She really didn't want to talk about it. But they had to know.

"See, I have a cousin... she's here, and she's traveling with my group. She has long blonde and red hair, green eyes and she's the reincarnated Midoriko, the missing southern lord's daughter and some inudemon goddess thingy. I also think that she's part cat too, for some reason she seems to be able to communicate with Kirara. She can fight like a warrior." At this, Kagome snorted. "Warriors don't make fighting moves look like ballet lessons."

Kouga laughed, "They sure don't not unless its that pretty boy brother of that Mutt's. Speaking of, why didn't someone step in and stop her?"

"Inuyasha and Miroku are in love with her, and I think that Sesshoumaru is courting her. Then she kicked me out of the group cause I refused to get along with her."

Kouga looked at Ayame who snorted in laughter. Kagome would cry from frustration if it weren't for the fact that she didn't "Feel" like it.

"Kagome you don't have anything to worry about. If you want, me and Kouga will help you search for the rest of the shards." Ayame supplied patting the girl on the back.

"Well being that she's the reincarnated Midoriko, I'm not going to go looking anymore. Let them make HER do all the shard hunting." Kagome pouted and Kouga chuckled a bit ruffling her hair.

"Well you're still one of us so its not like you aren't welcome to stay. If she comes here, we'll put them off the mountain."

"No Kouga, if she comes here looking for Kagome, we are going beat them off the mountains. We're going to lure her away and let Kagome beat the snot out of her. Then we're going to have a bonfire using her body." Ayame said with an evil glint.

Kagome decided that she was in love with the wolf demoness.

A/n I have failed to do it like I always do and I'm correcting it now. I don't own Inuyasha and I don't make money from it. I DO own Serah in all her Mary Suey ness.


	4. Down with the bloody moron!

She hadn't expected Naraku to show up, and while she prayed for a quick death to save her from the agony of being his little puppet for the rest of her life, he'd decided on something else.

Naraku had thought to keep Kouga, Ayame, and herself as hostages.

"I really was hoping that Serah would climb that mountain." Kagome groaned as she dangled uselessly from the ceiling. Ayame, who had been gagged for her mouth, settled on glaring at the male. Kouga had too been gagged but there was a suspicion that somewhere in there, Kagura had made the male her pet.

It wouldn't be surprising really, after all, Kouga was second to only Sesshoumaru in Kagura's heart.

Currently, Naraku was pacing the length of the room trying to decide how to go about destroying his group of enemies in one go. Of course they would come for the miko Kagome, who wouldn't?

"Its not like he'll come for me, he has his one true love. Your best bet is to make me as evil as you and send me to go kill them all so they could vanquish my evil." Kagome suggested as he paced about the room.

Naraku stopped and stared at her as if contemplating it for a moment and then shook his head.

"You know Naraku, Inuyasha has another female, he doesn't have a need for me." Kagome supplied.

"Oh really now?" Naraku replied. He called Kanna to him and ordered her to show him the position of the halfbreed and was awestruck.

Kagome saw the familiar look in his eyes and groaned.

"Who is that alluring female with them?" he questioned her.

"Midoriko's wannabe copycat." Kagome dryly replied.

"Kagura!" Naraku called out, and Kagome didn't have to wait long for the loyal minion to appear.

"Watch the miko and the wolves, it is time that I pay Inuyasha... a visit." an audible groan was heard in the background.

Naraku left in gust of miasma, leaving the Kaze and Kanna of the void to look after her.

Kagome could only hope that Naraku could only spare her and kill her first.

"So what's up with that Midoriko reincarnation?" Kagura asked peering into the mirror to see the girl summon out some sort of weapon in a poof of magical light and clouds. Kagura flinched back as if slapped by some invisible force.

"You can't be serious Kagome." she said glaring at the woman.

"What!? You made it sound like I wanted her to be here!" Kagome defended.

"What kind of... idiocy is this?" Kagura motioned to the mirror in horror.

"That would be my all powerful cousin. Taking on some demon, with nooooo effort at all."

Another thought struck the girl, "Kagura would you believe that she's courting Sesshoumaru?"

A look of outrage crossed Kagura's face, "What?"

"Yeah. She's that southern lord's long lost daughter. And she's engaged to Sesshoumaru. Funny ain't it?"

Kagura visibly fumed and threw down her fan in a rare show of temper, she kicked it across the room and pointed a finger at Kagome, "You will help me get rid of her!"

"Gladly. Now get me down and release my friends."

- With Serah-

"Way to go Inuyasha!" Serah cheered as he sliced down a demon that attacked her. Sango had advanced from gal pal to worshiper within the day, followed by group time Kagome bashing.

Sesshoumaru honestly didn't like the girl, actually he tolerated the girl a little more than he did Jaken. It was a gift really, the only reason why he hadn't killed the girl yet was because he had wanted to impress Kagome with his new found patience. However he had been making more and more excuses to not be in the group with his idiot half-breed brother and Serah's new fan club.

Then before bed Serah would tell them all stories about her hometown... that sounded no different than Kagome's...

Strangely enough to the halfbreed and everyone else, it sounded magical and full of mysteries!

Sesshoumaru had wanted to scoff, as if he didn't know what lay beyond the bone eater's well. Serah had "attempted" to weasel him into courting her, stating that she had no interest in his riches or title that she would have been happy just to be with him.

Where had he heard that line before?

Oh yeah, he heard that from the millions of other females that wanted him. Who could honestly look upon his perfection and not want it? The priestess Kagome included.

Then came Naraku in a dramatic entrance of suspenseful music, tentacles, and miasma, in that order.

"Naraku!" Inuyasha snarled.

However the male didn't seem as interested in him as they thought and when Serah was captured, everyone scrambled to save her.

"You will die for endangering my intended Half-breed." Sesshoumaru said pulling out Bakusaiga.

Naraku rolled his eyes, "Spare me the dialogue Lord Sesshoumaru, if you had wanted her, she'd be your mate by now. Because we all know how impatient you are."

"Naraku, I know you don't want to do this." Serah said to him gently.

Naraku, had decided that he wanted the girl for himself. He'd seen his happiness in the form of this... he didn't even know what she was.

She wasn't human he knew that much.

"Naraku I can take away your pain, just give me your part of the jewel." she pleaded.

And he gave it to her, just cause she looked so damned adorable when she pleaded!

Kagome and Kagura floated from the skies, and Naraku had handed over the jewel to Serah without any sort of fight.

And just because Serah was the reincarnation of Midoriko, the Shikon Jewel was purified and no more.

"That's it?" Kagome asked.

Kagura looked at her ally, "What do you mean?"

"All that fighting we did over that jewel and that was it? No epic battle? Just a blonde bimbo purifying the Jewel just cause she said 'pretty please?!'"

All that time she spent here missing out on school and it was ended when this whack job asked nicely?

What the hell?!

"Now Naraku, I'm going to purify your soul. I'll make it so that you can live, so that you can spend the rest of your life repenting with my he-" and Serah was tackled to the ground.

Then seemingly from thin air, Kouga and Ayame tied the girl up and Kouga carted her off in rapid speed.

"Hey! Where the hell are you taking my woman ya mangy wolf?" Inuyasha yelled attempting to go chase him.

Kagome wasn't having it. She snatched a handful of Miroku's binding Sutras from his robes and stuck them on the heads of Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Naraku.

"Kagome what are you doing?" Sango cried out.

"And just so there is no funny business," Kagome snapped her fingers and Kagura tied Miroku and Sango to a tree.

Growls filled the air and roars of outrage and anger filled her ears. Kagome wasn't hearing any of it.

"I'll see you guys in a couple of days." she stated with a wave and she hopped back on Kagura's feather and they flew away.

They traveled for a good thirty minutes before Kagome and Kagura arrived to find Serah making things hard for Kouga.

"You can't control a simple female?" Kagura asked with her hands on her hips.

"Shut up! She's tougher than she looks!" Kouga snapped dodging a round of pirouette like kicks.

Ayame tried to attack the girl only to get swept back by some wind.

This was getting out of hand.

Kagome rolled her eyes and took Kagura's fan away from her and stomped up to Serah with the fury of hell dancing behind her, and hit Serah in the back of the head forcefully while she had been distracted.

"Tie her down, the party's just beginning." Kagome ordered.


End file.
